That's intense
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
