i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
