clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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