I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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