Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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