would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
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