do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
