I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
