His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
