Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
