a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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