We won't sleep together?
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
