he shaved USA in his pubs
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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