i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
