I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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