no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
