The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
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