Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
Randomize
