using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize