shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
two words: eviction party
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
