everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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