The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
