Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize