Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
