D3 body, D1 cock
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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