Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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