All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
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