I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
and you fell through a lawn chair
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