Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
