My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
