i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
