the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Everything about him screamed your future.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Randomize
