He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
