Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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