Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
i can't believe i had my finger in that
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
whose parrot is this?
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Randomize
