But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Randomize
