TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
