How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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