Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
why do cheetos always look like penises
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
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