We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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