Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
there is glitter all over my balls
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
