don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
