I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
