I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
