Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
