That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
