That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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