so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
i may or may not be watching the land before time
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
