? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
