Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
