no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
