Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
